Your clients are a pain in the neck, cash flow is tight, you’re working harder than you team, and your marketing sucks, you are grumpy with your partner, the kids hide from you and even the dog keeps out of your way...
Sound familiar? - There are two facts about this situation;
1. It is only true to you - you just paint a dark picture because it fits in your dark corner at the moment...
So what to do...
First, remember that your view of the world is just that - your view. You make your view true for you by finding evidence and "facts" to support your belief that everything is going against you. You may even find that if you look really hard you can find other people who have a similar picture of the world - so then you can confirm your beliefs with negative affirmations and third party validations too - bravo, that should help..
Your physiology follows your emotional state - if you are unhappy, frustrated or angry, it will show. This will affect your behaviour, your work and your relationships. If you believe things are bad then you will create the environment for those "bad things" to become manifest to you.
Beliefs + (Thoughts x Actions) = Results
If you start the equation with a negative Belief – regardless of how positive your Thoughts and Actions are – the resultant Result will always be negative...
Imagine that we rate your Beliefs, Thoughts and Actions on a scale of -10 to +10 with -10 being very low or negative and +10 being very high and positive.
Let’s say that your results look like this;
Beliefs = -7, Thoughts = +2, Actions = +8
This means that whilst your beliefs are negative, you’re Thoughts, (hoping and praying) that things will get better, are +2 and your Actions are + 9 – you are really busy…
This is what your Result will be...
-7 + (2 x 8) = -23
It all starts with a belief…
If you decide to believe that, for example, social media, telemarketing or networking (pick anything from training to coaching, customer service to budgeting) won't work in your business - then guess what; it won't because you will sabotage the process and find reasons to justify why in your "special business" these strategies don't work - then you will look for facts to back up your argument.
If you search on Google for "social media doesn't work" you will get 406 Million results - now you can even write a book on how you always knew that social media wouldn't work - your ego will be inflated and you will be vindicated because you were right..
If however you search on Google for "social media does work" you will get 747 Million results - but because these facts are uncomfortable to your ego, you decide to ignore this and revert back to your comfortable dark corner safe with your other evidence. Doh..! This is painful because it means that you will have to concede that you are not the master of the entire universe and that, in fact, the laws of physics do apply to you.
So Rule 1 - drop the ego and choose a different belief.
Whatever Belief you choose, will manifest itself in your business and in your life – you will make it happen and attract the circumstances to yourself that will satisfy your ego’s demands for vindication.
One of the best ways to change a belief is knowledge and education – read books, watch videos, listen to stories of those who you actually want to be like. It isn’t that you will copy what they did, or have to do what they did – it is just that when you are open to the possibility of a different outcome, your belief changes and therefore so will your Thoughts, Actions and Reactions.
Using the formula above; let’s just assume that your Belief shifts to +2, this is what happens;
2 + (2 x 8) = 18
A positive result – in fact for a 9 point movement in Beliefs, you have achieved a 41 point shift in your Results…
Rule 2 – it's OK to get help...
This is another huge challenge to the ego – especially us guys. We are the hunter killers, we bring meat and make fire, we are the stealthy predators. Without help support, we build our business and our income simply because we are the alpha male – and we never cry either...
How is that working for you…?
What would you rather have, a huge balance sheet or a huge ego..?
The two are generally mutually exclusive, one is very attractive, and the other isn’t.
Man or woman – it doesn’t matter, reaching out and asking someone to help you is a great step in changing your beliefs; Coaching works not because the Coach knows all the answers, rather they ask the right questions to challenge your Beliefs and adapt your Thoughts and Actions.
If you have got this far, then we should talk – providing of course your ego doesn’t stop you pressing send on the email…
Remember, the easiest way to get out of your dark corner is to turn the light on – it just maybe that someone else needs to show you where the switch is..
You can contact me at davidholland@resultsrulesok.com
Kind Regards
David
this is right on the button...
ReplyDelete"Remember, the easiest way to get out of your dark corner is to turn the light on – it just maybe that someone else needs to show you where the switch is.."